Emotions, hurts and forgiveness, Love...

We have to be so careful what we rehearse in our minds, what beliefs and feelings we allow ourselves to take hold of. There is such damage done by not giving people the benefit of the doubt, or by reading into other's words or actions what we think their motives are.

St. Paul pleads with the churches "do not allow a root of bitterness to spring up among you, to defile many" - bitterness spreads defilement, gossip, slander, malice, mistrust etc. If you have people that need your forgiveness - it is a matter of life and death for you to forgive them - "if you do not forgive your Heavenly Father will not forgive you". Whether or not they will accept it or even see the need for it, it is really necessary to forgive anyway for your own good!

Reconciliation can sometimes seem impossible, the hurts and history/memories/rehearsed wrongs can be too raw and painful to even go back into the same room with the person involved for a while.

My love language is words, I desperately need good words to feel loved, and any words which are spoken in a negative or hurtful way to me tend to leave deep scars like a sharp stick would leave a scar if used to inflict pain.

We all need to feel loved, everybody needs compassion, and "all have fallen short". That is where the power of forgiveness can shine - God's grace covers over a multitude of sin. Love covers, it does not expose.

Love is patient and kind, longsuffering, it never gives up, it always believes the best and rejoices with the truth. Speaking the truth in love does not mean speaking it from hurt, it means being gentle and kind, believing the best.

Fault finding or laying blame never solves problems, and accepting our own part in relational upsets can help bring healing where it is needed. Trust may be damaged, and patterns of interaction may be changed. Only a change of heart can bring full reconciliation - and only God is able to bring that about.

I have learned afresh the need to continue letting go of self and allow God to live in and work on me. These times of deep pain can have a cleansing effect. I have been repeatedly reminded that all things do work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purposes. So this is a promise I take hold of yet again, and I claim the good.

Love is stronger, higher, more pure and powerful than any evil or selfishness this world can throw at us. I will keep pressing into that Love, hiding in the cleft of the Rock, trusting Him to carry me through it all. Love never gives up.

Sleep deprived musings

I often wake in the wee small hours (anytime between 0230 and 0430), sometimes because of noises from outside on the cul-de-sac which is usually silent. Then of course there is the need to visit the "little girls room", followed by a thirst which will not be ignored. So here I am, wide awake with a warm chocolate drink at my side, wondering if it will take the usual two hours to get back to sleep. Wanting to redeem the time.

Elijah has grown without me really being aware of it - we went for a bushwalk and discovered more of Eskdale reserve together on Easter Sunday (yesterday), and had a good talk. I tried to practice my speech which is due to be delivered Wednesday evening, but only got as far as a short introduction.

 

I know I want to talk about the brain, and have so much to share, but really ought to make a proper outline so I have a plan of where to go with it. There are several points I remember from Terry Small's sessions at the "Mind Your Brain" conference which I can remember thanks to his making us all repeat them aloud many times in the day. 1) The number one job of your brain is to KEEP YOU ALIVE. 2) The brain thinks in PICTURES. 3) The brain learns by MAKING CONNECTIONS. Also there are many other interesting facts such as you have over 100 billion brain cells (neurons), each of which is capable of making up to 40,000 connections. Therefore, YOU ARE A GENIUS. That doesn't even take into account the trillions of glial cells (white matter), which are also continually interacting on a cellular level with the neurons.

 

The brain has two hemispheres, each of which takes turns (about 20 min at a time for adults) being more awake than the other. We concentrate best in blocks of time about 20 min long, then for best productivity we need a short break, including movement across the midline, to wake up the whole brain again. I will demonstrate some interesting brain gym exercises, and also encourage the listeners to try some of them. Holding each ear with the opposite hand and squatting, slapping across to the opposite shoulders, crossing feet and twisting hands together and up under the chin. Some of these exercises have been used to great benefit to counteract panic attacks, to help children with severe learning difficulties improve dramatically, to improve memory (where DID those keys go?), and of course for older students who have essays to write!

 

Now, I need to flesh it out with some little personal stories and then practice fitting it all into 5 to 7 minutes. Might be a challenge, and I have until Wednesday to make it polished. Plus of course, including the loud and soft voice dynamics on which I will be evaluated for this particular speech... FUN!

 

Wish me luck - or please pray if you don't believe in luck.

Until next time I wake in the night...

Sleep tight! And have a wonderful time reminding everyone around you they are all geniuses.